Quote of the day

From The Guardian (here), anent Sarah Ferguson's financial troubles:

The Queen was "deeply concerned" about Ferguson's debts, according to the Sunday Telegraph, and had discussed them with David Cameron recently at one of his weekly audiences. The newspaper said Prince Andrew, Ferguson's ex-husband, was masterminding a "rescue plan" to avoid the embarrassment of filing for bankruptcy.

The idea of Prince Andrew masterminding anything conveys a certain risibility. But if it keeps him away from yachts ...

Hung out to dry?

No doubt rather sensible of Mr Cameron. The BBC reports:

UK Department of Health calls to scrap free nursery milk in Scotland have been ditched by Downing Street.

Westminster has powers to end free milk, yet the cost of the scheme in Scotland is met by Holyrood.

In a letter to the Scottish government, UK Public Health Minister Anne Milton said the scheme was costly and there was no evidence of health benefits.

But Downing Street scrapped the move after it emerged Prime Minister David Cameron was not aware of the proposals.

But where does that leave Ms Milton?

Just like old times

O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay! Some things never change. But as homage to the original milk snatcher in the 1970s, this takes some doing. The BBC reports:

Free milk for nursery children could be scrapped in Scotland under plans drawn up by the UK Department of Health.

Doing their homework?

Yes - I know that the ostensible purpose of this blog is to discuss Scottish politics. But these are the dull days of August and nothing much of any significant political interest is taking place.

And, yet, we have an election in about 9 months. Would it be over-optimistic of me to presume that the backroom (and indeed front-room) boys and girls of the main parties are girding up their metaphorical loins in preparation? I appreciate that the Tories are once again pondering their collective navel; and the less said about the no-hopers of the LibDem persuasion the better.

Are the SNP organising themselves in the elaboration of a robust defence of a local income tax, ironing out the little (and not so little) difficulties caused by inadequate preparation the first time round?

Is Labour preparing a sound,defensible case for revising or replacing the council tax, rather than (as last time) leaving the matter to the last minute, thereby allowing themselves to be exposed as not having thought the matter through?

Do bears do their business in porcelain toilets?

Beyond satire

From the US Army Times (here):

This summer soldiers will start fighting with a new, “green” bullet that Army ballistics officials are touting as “the best general purpose 5.56mm round ever.”
...
The Enhanced Performance Round contains an environmentally friendly projectile that eliminates up to 2,000 tons of lead from the manufacturing process each year in direct support of Army commitment to environmental stewardship.

No doubt the Taliban will be pleased to hear that they are being shot at with green bullets.

Shades of indulgence

Seems a little tawdry, somehow, but if you wish to commemorate the papal visit, here is where to go to buy your Benedict t-shirt, baseball cap or fridge magnet.

Quote of the day

From a Halifax ad (shown twice on ITV4 during the halftime interval of the Liverpool-Rabotnicki match):

"Better deals for our current account customers."

The truth, as spelled out in The Herald earlier in the day:

Bank of Scotland [of which Halifax is a part] is writing to tens of thousands of small business customers telling them that it will no longer pay interest on their current account balances, as owner Lloyds Banking Group unveils bumper first-half profits of £1.6 billion.

While UK base rates of 0.5% mean business customers of Bank of Scotland do not currently receive interest on their current accounts, the move by the bank could cost them many millions of pounds in total when the benchmark cost of borrowing eventually returns to more normal levels.

Do you still believe the banks are honest?

Music of the week

Casus belli

How a tree almost started a war. The Independent reports:

It was a miserable, scrawny thing, probably a spruce and – after a 46-degree heatwave in Lebanon – its foliage blocked the Israeli security cameras on the Israeli-Lebanese border near Addaiseh. The Israelis decided to use a crane to rip it out. But there's a problem. No one is exactly sure where the Israeli-Lebanese border is.

In 2000, the UN drew a "Blue Line" along what was – in those long ago, post-Balfour days – the frontier between the French mandate of Lebanon and the British mandate of Palestine. Behind it, from the Lebanese point of view, stands the Israeli "technical fence", a mass of barbed wire, electrified wires and sandy roads (to look for footprints). So when the Lebanese army saw the Israelis manoeuvre a crane up to the fence yesterday morning, they began to shout at the Israelis to move back.

The moment the crane's arm crossed the "technical fence" – and here one must explain that the "Blue Line" does not necessarily run along the "fence" – Lebanese soldiers opened fire into the air. The Israelis, according to the Lebanese, did not shoot in the air. They shot at the Lebanese soldiers.

Result: five dead, because of a tree, for such is the way of the Middle East.

Oh Silvio

You have to admire his stamina.

The man will be 74 next month.

The picture above is of one of the ladies involved.

The equalities

It is hard to believe that the Chancellor's budget could be struck down by the courts but that appears to be the implication of St Theresa's letter. The Guardian reports:

Theresa May, the home secretary and equalities minister, warned the chancellor that cuts in the budget could widen inequality in Britain and ran a "real risk" of breaking the law, a letter leaked to the Guardian shows.

The letter was sent to George Osborne on 9 June, less than a fortnight before his emergency budget, and was copied to David Cameron.

May wrote "there are real risks" that people ranging from ethnic minorities to women, to the disabled and the old, would be "disproportionately affected".

...

May warns that government spending decisions face being struck down by the judiciary. "If there are no processes in place to show that equality issues have been taken into account in relation to particular decisions, there is a real risk of successful legal challenge by, for instance, recipients of public services, trades unions or other groups affected by these decisions."

Despite this letter, it would appear that Treasury completely and utterly ignored the advice when it came to the budget and - possibly - to the public spending review. As The Guardian reveals, the court cases are now in preparation.

This business of government: it becomes increasingly complicated ...

The myth of the beer belly?

Much as I enjoy a pint or two of the foaming liquid and much as I respect CAMRA for saving Scotland from Tartan Special and Kestrel lager, I cannot really put any faith in the proposition advanced in this article in The Independent:

A huge real ale festival opens today with new research claiming that beer can help people lose weight - when drunk in moderation.

The Campaign for Real Ale (Camra) said a third of men and women wrongly believe that beer has more calories than other alcoholic drinks.

Swapping wine for beer for just one week would save as many calories as a half-hour jog, Camra claims.

But if slimmers wish to believe it, then who am I to discourage the poor souls?

Public spending squeeze

This seems short-sighted, even mean-spirited. The FT reports:

Civil servants within the Treasury are to sit at smaller desks closer together in order to squeeze hundreds of workers from elsewhere in Whitehall into the building.

The attempt to sub-let part of 1 Horse Guards Road, just off St James’ Park, is the latest austerity measure by George Osborne as the coalition insists on hairshirt measures government-wide.

Sure, you can always squeeze a few extra bodies into any given space. But anyone who cares to visit the first or second floor of Victoria Quay at Leith will see the dispiriting result.

Oh woe!

We may not have reached the end of July but that's Hibs' European campaign over for the season.

It's not fair. Every summer, we approach the new season full of joyous ambition and by autumn (or earlier) we experience the bitter taste of ashes. It's not even as though Slovenia, delightful country as it is, is one of the giants of European football.

Miseria!

Simples?

When a politician says that he intends to simplify matters, don't believe him. What you and I mean by simplification is an alien concept to the political classes. The Independent reports:

Mr Duncan Smith will suggest replacing the 51 benefits currently available to the unemployed, as well as income-related benefits for the low-paid, with a single benefit covering all people of working age. It would also incorporate the cash currently paid out under Gordon Brown's flagship tax credits scheme, which would effectively be abolished.

Payments would take into account claimants' circumstances, such as numbers of children and housing needs, and could be adjusted monthly using new computer software being developed by the Government.

In order to take account of the differing needs of those who qualify, that simple single benefit will be so complicated as to be unworkable, so that at least half of the beneficiaries will be badly let down by the system, being given less of a benefit than that to which they are entitled.

And doncha just love that phrase "using new computer software being developed by the Government"? This means that the software will not only be late in arriving but also that it will also cost five times more than the initial estimate and, crucially, that it will not work properly. Result: chaos all round.

Will they ever learn?

Good news and bad news

The good

Our political masters have indicated that it will no longer be compulsory to retire at the age of 65.

The Bad

You may be obliged to work beyond the age of 65 by virtue of the the Government's plans to postpone the old age pension beyond 65.

What's he up to ...

... or perhaps what is he on? Has going abroad gone to his head? First, he upsets France and Germany by accusing them of blocking Turkey's accession to the EU. He then goes on to upset Israel (admittedly a far from difficult task). And now he has put the boot in to Pakistan.

Is this Cameron's idea of diplomacy? He may well be correct in his criticisms (or at least in some of them) but is pandering to the Turks and the Indians the most effective means of getting the message across?

In praise of subtitles

One of the reasons why I no longer frequent my local cinemas is that I find it difficult to follow the dialogue. Young people speak so quickly these days, particularly (but not exclusively) in the movies. Nevertheless, I do love a good flick - and it is therefore a welcome aid to comprehension that the vast majority of DVDs provide subtitles. You may suggest that in my dotage I am increasingly corned beef and I would not dissent unduly.

I have just finished watching The Road which, at least for me, would have been mystifying had it not been for the subtitles. Beautifully filmed, well acted and properly respectful of the novel. But, jeez, what a depressing film.

The DVD highlight of the summer has been Up in the Air, the best movie I have seen in years. Clooney should give up the coffee ads and concentrate on proper films.

Honorable mention for The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo, provided you can tolerate the fact that it is in Swedish (with English subtitles)*. I enjoyed it enormously.


*You can watch it dubbed into English but this seems to me the worst of all possible options.

Envious? Well maybe just a little ...

Can't be bad, eh? You mess up, big-time, but end up at 53 years old with a million quid pay-off and a pension of £10,000 per week from your 55th birthday.

How do you spend £10,000 a week? Sure, you might manage it in week 1: as Clapton put it, take all your friends out for a mighty good time, drink bootleg liquor, champagne and wine. Or I suppose you spend an odd million or two on a fancy house - you can afford the mortgage after all. And then there's the Ferrari Testarossa and the holiday home in the West Indies.

But will you be happy?

To be honest, who cares ...

How not to win friends and influence people

You might have thought that BP would, as far as possible, be seeking to keep its head down, particularly in the light of the suspicion (apparently well-founded) that the UK Government was prepared to release Mr al-Megrahi (or at least transfer him to Libya) in return for BP being given access to the Libyan oilfields. Not a chance: The Independent reports:

The tortuous saga of BP, the Gulf of Mexico, the Lockerbie bombing and an America which feels itself badly wronged took another turn yesterday when it emerged that the oil company is about to start drilling at an even greater depth in, of all places, Libyan waters.

And, as that information was being absorbed, there came an announcement that Jack Straw, the former justice secretary, had declined an invitation to attend the upcoming US Senate hearing into possible links between BP and the release last August of Abdelbaset al-Megrahi, who was convicted of the murder of 259 passengers on Pan Am Flight 103, and 11 Lockerbie residents. Megrahi, who was diagnosed with cancer, was put on a plane back to Tripoli after doctors said he had only three months to live.

The Senate Foreign Relations Committee is investigating allegations that the release, officially on compassionate grounds, was ordered in return for economic co-operation, including access to oil and gas fields. Tony Blair, former prime minister and "friend of Gaddafi", has also become embroiled in the affair.

No, BP announces its expansion into Libyan waters, thus waving a red rag to the Senate Foreign Relations Committee. Does BP not have PR advisers? Did nobody in the upper echelons think that it might be better to keep this under wraps for at least a couple of weeks, so that the proposals emerged in the dog-days of August when everyone that matters is on holiday?

At any rate, the episode lends succour to the proposition that the size of a company is in direct proportion to the stupidity of its management.