Getting carried away

Paul Mason has been taking the Glasgow temperature:

The most coherent of the young people I spoke to understood the macro-economic risk. But they weighed it against two increasingly intolerable burdens: the inability of Scotland's relatively left-leaning electorate to influence Westminster; and the inability to budge Scottish Labour away from the free-market and pro-austerity policies associated with Brown and Darling.

What this means is, even if the yes vote fails on 18 September, scoring somewhere in the mid 40s, the pattern of all future Scottish independence debates is set.

Independence has become a narrative of the people against big government; about an energised Scottish street, bar and nightclub versus the sleazy elite of official politics.

And from whence did he form such a conclusion?

Having spent last week in Glasgow, I would say the biggest variable is going to be turnout. When political enthusiasm reaches the relatively apolitical world of the council estate, the pub, the nightclub and energises people, turnout can do weird things to poll predictions. Alex Salmondclaimed there would be 80% turnout. I think the chances are even higher – and if the polls actually cope with such volume, every percentage point above normal introduces volatility not captured by normal polling.

At the Sub Club, a world-famous nightspot in Glasgow, the debate was remarkably coherent, even at 2am among the intoxicated smokers huddled outside. If I could distil the vox pops among those under-30s to a single thought it would be: "We want to run our own country."

Heaven preserve us from commentators who spend a week in Glasgow, visiting nightclubs at 2 am, and who think that they can discern the Scottish mind.

    

Just a thought

So the government is to have a crackdown on those going off to fight in the Middle East:

Speaking at Downing Street after his return from a pre-referendum trip to Scotland, Cameron said: "It is becoming clear that there are some gaps in our armoury and we need to strengthen them. We need to do more to stop people travelling, to stop those who do go from returning and to deal decisively with those who are already here."

If Cameron had been Prime Minister in the 1930s, what would have been his attitude to those Brits (such as Orwell) who travelled to Spain to fight alongside communists and anarchists in the Spanish civil war?

 

Music of the week

What happened to the Glorious Revolution?

This business of the appointment of next Clerk to the House of Commons.  Here is a brief summary of the position from The Telegraph:

Mr Bercow [the Speaker] wants to appoint Carol Mills, an Australian, to be Clerk. A lot of MPs, of all parties, think that’s a mistake, suggesting she’s not qualified. This has led to an impasse. Technically, it’s up to the Speaker, as chair of the Commons Commission, to propose a new clerk. That candidate is then put forward by the Prime Minister to the Queen for approval.

I have no strong views as to the merits or suitability of Ms Mills.  What I find amazing is the involvement of the Queen.  I appreciate that it may now be a formality.  Nevertheless, why should the Queen be even marginally involved in the appointment of the most senior official in the House of Commons?  Is the House of Commons independent of the monarchy or not?  How can the Commons hold the Executive to account when the titular head of the latter has to approve appointments to the former?


 

I used to be indecisive ...

... but now I'm not so sure.

Yes, I will shortly be departing this sun-kissed paradise - albeit temporarily - to embrace once again the doubtful pleasures of Auld Reekie in September.  And, perhaps, to cast my vote in the forthcoming referendum.  For indeed I still have sufficient ties to the dear old place to qualify for a place on the electoral roll.

But which way to vote?  And, prior to that, have I a moral right to vote?  Although I pay UK income tax on my pension and council tax in respect of my humble Edinburgh abode, I cannot deny that I am spending more and more time in sunny Spain.  So should I be permitted to throw in my tuppenceworth to the momentous decision, when the effect on me and mine will be limited?  Me, ah dinnae ken.

As for the vote itself, if I do exercise my voting rights, which way should I jump?  Sure enough, it's a sair fecht.

Could I bear to see the land of my birth subjected to another five years of Westminster rule by the Tories?  Increasing pressure on welfare services, cuts to public services across the board and the probability of a UK exit from the EU.  And, even if the Tories lose the general election next May, would life under Miliband be significantly better?  Furthermore, I have little faith in the UK parties' promises of additional devolution.  (Been here before, have we not?)

On the other hand, can I trust Scotia's future to Salmond and his henchmen?  Has he really thought matters through, on the currency, the EU membership and on Trident?  Or is his version of independence little more than toytown politics where London remains calling the shots?  And, while the quality of the members of the Scottish Parliament may on the whole be marginally better than their Westminster counterparts, do I really think that they are fit to run the country?

All very difficult.

   

Choices, choices ...

On telly tonight.  Will I watch the football (Man City v Liverpool) or the Great Debate (Part II)?  Duty suggests the latter.  But, I could watch the football match live and then the debate on the i-player (assuming of course that it is indeed on the i-player).

Mind you, I wouldn't be surprised if both events turned out to be goalless draws ...

 

Why football managers lack common sense

1.  Van Gaal of Man Utd bidding £60m for di Maria, an Argentinian winger

Obvious from last week's first match that Man Utd's desperate need is for a holding defensively-minded midfield player, not yet another attacker.

2.  Rodgers of Liverpool looking to sign Balotelli

How daft can you get?  Every centre-half in the Premier League will seek to wind him up.  And no doubt successfully ...

 
Update:  From The Observer (here):

Mourinho reckons his book of Balotelli anecdotes would stretch to 200 pages and the one he likes to tell the most is a belter. “We went to play Rubin Kazan in the Champions League. All my other strikers were injured. No Diego Milito, no Samuel Eto’o. I was really in trouble. Mario got a yellow card in the 42nd minute and when I got into the dressing room at half-time I spent 14 minutes of the 15 available speaking to Mario. I said to him: ‘Mario, I can’t change you, I have no strikers on the bench, don’t touch anybody and play only the ball. Mario, if someone provokes you, don’t react. If we lose the ball, no reaction. If the referee makes a mistake, no reaction.” A pause. “The 46th minute: red card.”

Poll tax on wheels

The Observer delves into the mysteries of rail privatisation:

The collapse of Railtrack in 2001 after the Hatfield disaster forced the creation of Network Rail, a not-for-dividend statutory corporation limited by guarantee, an elaborate organisational con to avoid the dread words "public company" and "nationalisation", even though it is 100% owned by the state. The de facto state backing has allowed it to run up borrowing of £30bn to finance rail investment, but at higher rates of interest than if it had been openly acknowledged that it was publicly owned. The cumulative extra servicing cost is more than £150m, but as the Office for National Statistics is now calling for the con to be ended and the debt reclassified as public debt, it's all for nothing. Brilliant.

Directly Operated Railways is the 100% publicly owned company that took over the east coast mainline when the incompetent private operator walked away from its obligations in 2009. Five years of public ownership and it is now the best run and most efficient operator, making a net surplus of £16m for the taxpayer. Its reward? To be sold back to a private operator next February that will redirect the surplus through a tax haven as dividends, game the Department for Transport for higher government support and walk away if the financial returns are not good enough. Thus the benefits of British-style private ownership in a public network. Meanwhile, the absurdities of privatisation continue. Two of the three companies that own the rolling stock leased to the train operating companies are owned in Jersey, the third is owned in Luxembourg. None shows any interest in supporting rolling stock manufacture in the country they so casually pillage. 

Crazy.

 

Watch it and weep

Quote of the day

From an Englishman in The Independent (here):

Next they’ll say that an independent Scotland can’t use British clouds, so all rain will become the property of the Meteorological Office, turning Scotland into a desert overrun by wolves in 2018. Nor will they be allowed to keep the British religion, so the Holy Ghost will stop at Carlisle and everyone in Scotland will be forced to worship Zeus.

Yesterday Margaret Curran MP announced that another reason to vote No was that “an independent Scotland would lose access to some BBC programmes.” Is this the level of the debate as a nation decides its destiny? When Gandhi was fighting for the liberation of India did he tell his supporters, “Not only will we become a free and self-governing people, proud at last to determine our own future, but we’ll still be able to watch Homes Under the Hammer?”

  

Research?

Hmmph!  So, allegedly, Kindle readers take in less than traditional book readers.  The Guardian reports:

The researchers suggest that "the haptic and tactile feedback of a Kindle does not provide the same support for mental reconstruction of a story as a print pocket book does".

"When you read on paper you can sense with your fingers a pile of pages on the left growing, and shrinking on the right," said Mangen. "You have the tactile sense of progress, in addition to the visual ... [The differences for Kindle readers] might have something to do with the fact that the fixity of a text on paper, and this very gradual unfolding of paper as you progress through a story, is some kind of sensory offload, supporting the visual sense of progress when you're reading. Perhaps this somehow aids the reader, providing more fixity and solidity to the reader's sense of unfolding and progress of the text, and hence the story."

Sounds a bit dodgy to me.  Where is the evidence?

The study, presented in Italy at a conference last month and set to be published as a paper, gave 50 readers the same short story by Elizabeth George to read. Half read the 28-page story on a Kindle, and half in a paperback, with readers then tested on aspects of the story including objects, characters and settings.

So the researchers are willing to draw conclusions on a single test based on a small sample of only 50 readers on one short story?  Not really serious, is it?

 

Music of the week

Whatever happened to Dire Straits?

Yo-yo monetary policies

One quarter, the signal is for higher interest rates; the next quarter, it's the opposite.  CityAM reports:

Sterling plunged to its lowest level in two months as governor Mark Carney spoke, with analysts suggesting that the Bank’s latest inflation report was backtracking from the governor’s more hawkish tones in June.

Societe Generale economists pushed back their forecast for the Bank’s first post-crisis interest rate hike, and now argued that the increase would not probably take place until early 2015. RBC Capital Markets added that market exp­ect­ations for the eventual tightening shifted three months to next April.

Carney’s comments at his Mansion House speech in June had the opposite effect – the governor indicated that rates could rise before markets expected.

Do you suppose that the Golden Boy knows what he is doing?

Quote of the day

The Chief Foreign Correspondent of The Telegraph takes a firm line:

We should be willing to bear the costs and risks of military action alongside America in the cause of protecting the minorities of Iraq from the risk of extermination. To do otherwise would be to place our own phobias – our visceral reluctance to return to Iraq, our abhorrence of risk, and our new reluctance to use force even against the most implacable foe – above the moral case for action.

If you start with the question "what is right", then unless you are an outright pacifist, I submit that the answer is clear: the moral course is to use force to protect a minority from possible extirpation. If you accept that argument, then everything else falls into place.

I can readily see the attractions of such a firm stance.  But what would we be getting into?  Is there any real prospect of defeating Islamic State by dropping bombs on them?  Or of bringing them to the conference table?  Would we be taking on an open-ended commitment to defend the Yazidis and the Kurds?  For how long?  At what cost?  What would be the exit strategy?

I don't pretend to know the answers.  There are no easy choices.  But if we are to go beyond humanitarian aid, we need to have a much clearer idea of the strategy involved.

 

Been here before

Aye, well.  The Zoo is crying wolf again:

Following a sustained frenzy of pregnancy speculation on a scale that perhaps only the Duchess of Cambridge can relate to, Scotland's celebrated female giant panda, Tian Tian, is likely to give birth at the end of this month, Edinburgh zoo has announced.

The 10-year-old panda underwent artificial insemination in April after she and her male counterpart loaned to the zoo from China, Yang Guang, stubbornly declined to proceed as nature intended.

I hope that it is not too ungallant to suggest that the Countess of Strathearn (to give her Scottish title) is rather more reliable when it comes to moherhood.

 

It's not fair

It's a tough old life, being an MP.  The Guardian reports:

Mark Simmonds, the Africa minister, said he would stand down from government immediately and would leave his Boston and Skegness seat at next year's general election.

He said that the rental allowance of £27,875 a year plus £2,500 for each of his three children would not be enough to maintain a family home in Westminster and that he would not be prepared to live outside central London.

Simmonds earns £89,435 a year as an MP and minister and employs his wife Lizbeth with up to £25,000 of public money.

His reasons for stepping down have been heavily criticised on Twitter and have exposed the differences in perception of many MPs – who believe that the expenses regime is penalising their ability to live normal family lives – and voters who still believe parliamentarians receive too much public money.

His resignation comes just days after Lady Warsi resigned from her Foreign Office post over the government's policy on the crisis in Gaza.

Simmonds said he was leaving primarily so he can spend time with his family because he cannot afford to house them in central London.

So, on top of his annual family income of £114,835, Mr Simmons would like the public purse to provide him with a family home in Central London.  Wouldn't we all ...?

 

If the cap fits ...

The Guardian reports:

A top banker at Standard Chartered, which was warned on Wednesday that it was facing its second fine in two years for breaches of US rules, has complained that bankers are being treated "like criminals" when money laundering rules are broken.

I wonder why ...

 

As others see us

From El Pais (here):

Fue un debate cuerpo a cuerpo del que aparentemente salió victorioso el no, aunque por los pelos. Alex Salmond, principal ministro de Escocia y defensor del sí a la independencia y Alistair Darling, la cara del noescogida por el Gobierno británico para defender la permanencia en el Reino Unido, se batieron en duelo abierto frente a las cámaras de televisión escocesas por primera vez desde que se convocó el referéndum hace ya dos años.

Pero al finalizar el debate era difícil decir quién lo había ganado. No obstante, la primera encuesta, realizada por ICM entre 512 personas, situaba a Darling como ganador con un 56% de los televidentes de su parte frente a un 44% que le dio la victoria a Salmond. Y eso mismo parecían decir los tuits lanzados durante y tras el debate que duró una hora y media y en el que la economía fue la pieza clave. De hecho, el Gobierno británico hizo coincidir con el día del cara a cara su anuncio de nuevos poderes para los escoceses para recaudar impuestos y controlar de forma independiente la Seguridad Social.

A Darling le restó puntos el haber sido responsable del Tesoro británico durante la crisis de 2008, algo que Salmond se ocupó de recordarle al público. “Usted no tiene credibilidad. Usted era el responsable de las regulaciones financieras cuando los bancos colapsaron”, espetó al poco de iniciar el debate.

   

.

Debate of the deaf?

For those of my readers unable to access the STV Player.  (Only the highlights)

The Great Debate

Not taking it seriously enough -

http://www.theguardian.com/politics/shortcuts/2014/aug/04/scottish-independence-referendum-debate-drinking-game

Aw diddums ...

It's a tough life being a banker.  Here is Douglas Flint, Chairman of HSBC, complaining about all the regulation bankers have to put up with:

The demands now being placed on the human capital of the firm and on our operational and systems capabilities are unprecedented. The cumulative workload arising from a regulatory reform programme that is unfortunately increasingly fragmented, often extra-territorial, still evolving and still adding definition is hugely consumptive of resources that would otherwise be customer facing. Add to this recent obligations to perform highly granular multiple stress tests which are inconsistent in definition and scenarios between major jurisdictions and so require considerable duplication of effort; recently announced significant wholesale market practice and competition reviews in the UK; re-organising the financial, operational and structural framework of the Group to respond to evolving thinking on cross-border resolution protocols; and, finally, planning what will be a multi-year project to separate and establish the ring-fenced bank in the UK, and the dimension of the execution risk is obvious.

To be clear, we are committed and resourced to deliver all of the above. But there is extremely limited spare capacity. Prioritisation, which is clearly critical, will require support and guidance from public policy and regulatory bodies, particularly in the UK, regarding the juxtaposition of the recently announced competition review and preparation for the creation of the ring-fenced bank. Equally important is delivery of the stated intention of the Financial Stability Board and the G20 to seek to draw a close on fresh regulatory initiatives by the end of this year.

Doncha feel sorry for the poor lambs?  Of course, it might have been less necessary to impose all that regulation, had it not been for all their past misdeeds - such as rigging LIBOR rates and mis-selling insurance policies, not to mention their role in the Great Crash.  And was it not HSBC that acted as a banker for a Mexican drug cartel?  And now, today, more evidence has come to light on how HSBC may have failed to observe the law in relation to consumer credit agreements.

 

Killjoy

Sour grapes from one writer in The Guardian:

Little-known sportspeople and those who cover them are fully entitled to enjoy the limelight. What quickly became tedious was the assertion that these Games offered an epic sporting event. They never do, regardless of the host.

This has generally been a party for the middle class. Which is fine, but people should know better than to supply an alternative, force-fed narrative.

Scotland has apparently become so impoverished as a sporting nation that the sight of any success at all is hailed beyond comprehension and context. At the time of writing, one able-bodied world record has been broken. Runners from Tonga and Gibraltar were lapped three times on the Hampden track. The men’s 1500m and marathon Commonwealth records have been in place since 1974; they aren’t isolated statistics.

This year’s medal table tells a story about the standard of the Games. There are more medals available than ever before, an important footnote to tales of national glory.

So the BBC went over the top - as per usual.  But by all accounts, the athletes enjoyed the Games and, certainly, the crowds did.  What's not to celebrate?

   

Rumble in the jungle

McKenna in The Observer runs his rule over the participants in The Great TV Debate later this week.

First up, the Darling of the Noes:

Darling's only hope of matching his opponent (he will never better him) during this exchange and the second one to follow lies in disrupting the flow of debate. The former chancellor is a thoroughly insipid public speaker who engenders no passion or belief in what he is saying. His answers seem learned by rote and his continual blinking as he's delivering them makes him look unconvincing, like an understudy who's just been acquainted with the script owing to the leading man being incapacitated.

Is he really that bad?

Then there is the bold Alex:

Salmond's main challenge during this debate will not come from any deft touch or rapier thrust from his opponent. Rather, the biggest obstacle he must overcome is his own self-confidence and sense of self-satisfaction. If he does begin to eviscerate Darling early in the proceedings, he must avoid any showboating or mock-exasperation or that smirking thing that he does like the swot who knows the answer but lets the class bampots make eejits of themselves trying to answer first.

It's not difficult to descend from intellectually robust to mere rodomontade and sometimes Salmond does it, especially when he dismisses sentiments he doesn't like as "bluff and bluster".

I look forward to the mere rodomontade, whatever that is*.

   

* Boastful talk or behaviour

Scottish weather forecast

Music of the week

"The boots just go back on
The socks that have stayed on"

Monkey business

The Guardian reports:

India's new government won an overwhelming mandate in the recent elections, and now it has taken on another parliamentary foe: marauding monkeys.

India's housing and urban development minister, Venkaiah Naidu, told MPs that 40 professional monkey impersonators would be deployed around government buildings to police the cheeky rhesus macaque monkeys who regularly trespass in the corridors of power, terrorising senior bureaucrats, stealing files and snatching food.

The human monkey scarers will disguise themselves as the macaque's natural nemesis, the larger, black-faced langur, Naidu said.

Insert your own joke about human monkey scarers at Westminster.

   

 

What to do about bankers?

The Guardian has a solution:

For years, the country's most celebrated thinkers have struggled to come up with a way to keep those pesky bankers in check. Tighter regulation? That won't work. A reduction of annual bonuses? Unlikely to change anything. A root-and-branch overhaul of the entire system, including a quantifiable focus on ethics and more punitive measures for anyone who steps out of line? Nope.

But, finally, a solution has been found. A padlocked, bulletproof, triple-checked solution that's guaranteed to stop bankers from being reckless and self-interested: oaths. That's right, according to thinktank ResPublica, bankers should have to say an oath. Out loud, too, because ResPublica is not messing about.

Of course, they're not being serious.  But a little (or a lot) of jail time might fit the bill ...

 

Quote of the day

Here:

George Osborne is the bugle boy for the "march of the makers" and wants annual exports to double to £1tn by 2020, which now appears entirely unfeasible. The coalition is presiding over a recovery without productivity gains, a recovery without pay rises, a recovery without rising tax receipts and a recovery without export growth. It's recovery, Jim, but not as we know it.

Live long and prosper?  Probably not ...

 

Media attention

If you care to look at the BBC World website or the Guardian equivalent, you will find - appropriately enough - any amount of articles on the Israel/Palestine crisis.  But the Syrian civil war and the Iraqi conflict appear to have dropped off the map.

Is it war fatigue concerning the apparently endless strife in the latter benighted countries?  Or are the media simply incapable of covering more than one Middle East crisis at a time?

   
 

The reluctant horticulturalist

The story began when I admired the mint growing profusely in a sort of pot/window box on the terrace of the bar.  My pals noted the relish with which I crumbled a mint leaf in my hands, releasing that clean fragrance which so enhances lightly-boiled new potatoes.  A day or two later, I was presented with a little pot with a mint cutting which I duly planted in the hitherto barren window box which stretches the length of the terrace of my apartment.

I confess that tending to greenery is far from my forte; usually, I need only look sideways at a plant for it to turn up its toes in disgust.  Nevertheless, this little mint plant evoked some sort of spiritual renaissance in my gardening soul and I tended it with loving care and lots of water (but only after the sun had moved round to leave the plant in the shade).  And it has thrived!  After two weeks of TLC, it has put out little offshoots and looks happy.

Reporting this magnificent progress - with an unjustified element of pride - back to the guys in the bar, they subsequently proceeded to acquire from the local market a further half dozen herbs of various denominations.  I therefore felt obliged to buy some compost to assist their taking root in my rather stony window box.  Astonished to find that a big bag (more than was necessary) cost only 1.20 euros.

So now I am the proud owner of a herb garden, comprising parsley, sage, rosemary and thyme (you can tell that we are of a certain age), as well as oregano and basil.  Somehow, a stray strawberry plant has also appeared.

So not only will my new tatties taste delightful, my ragu will be ever more flavourful.  Provided the damn things don’t die on me …

What is the world coming to? (part 35)

The Guardian reports:

Sales of Tunnock's teacakes have soared after they featured in the opening ceremony of the Commonwealth Games, a supermarket has said. Customers have been stocking up on the sweet treat after giant dancing teacakes whirled around Celtic Park, Glasgow, on Wednesday.

Waitrose said in the 24 hours following the ceremony, sales rose by 62%. 

   

Everything in the garden is wonderful, more or less

More confirmation that the UK economy is on the road to recovery:

The International Monetary Fund has raised its forecast for Britain's economic growth rate for the second time this year.

The Washington-based organisation said Britain would maintain its status as one of the world's fastest expanding major economies following a surge in growth to 3.2% by the end of the year.

The lender of last resort, which is headed by former French finance minister Christine Lagarde, uprated the UK's outlook for GDP growth by 0.4 percentage points this year and 0.2 percentage points to 2.7% next year in its latest world economic outlook.

(Not that the IMF is any better at economic prediction than anyone else.)  But still, taken together with the employment figures, things are looking reasonably rosy.  The only fly in the ointment is the failure of income figures to match inflation.

This being so, one might expect Slasher Osborne and his Tory confreres to be celebrating a recovery in the opinion polls.  On the contrary, however, Labour is maintaining a small but substantial lead of 3 to 4 percentage points, more than enough to deliver an overall majority in next year's election

Time is getting short.  Will the Tories start to panic?

   

Aaargh! It's the Green Blob ...

Worth a read - here


 

From Today to Newsnight

His smugness on  his travels.  He'll be even more pleased with himself (if that is possible).

 

Quote of the day

From Tony Blair. a man who knows all about delusionary thinking (here):

 "20 years ago we were, as now, motivated by injustice, poverty, despair and deprivation. We want society to change and actively to lift up those who are down. It begins with an analysis of the world shaped by reality not ideology, not by delusionary thoughts based on how we want the world to be, but by hard-headed examination of the world as it actually is. The same applies to how we interact with people. This has to mean real people. Not the ones you find in the committee room but the ones you find at the bus stop or the bar or the cinema."

Aye, right.  When did you last see Mr Blair standing at a bus stop?


 

The rewards of failure

I would not go so far as to suggest that the man should not be given a modest compansation for his sacking but this seems excessive:

Tesco boss Philip Clarke was brutally ousted on Monday after failing to halt a dramatic slide in sales and profits, and replaced by a little-known executive from Unilever with no retail experience.

...

Despite his failure to turn the business round, Clarke could walk away with close to £10m in cash and shares, according to proxy voting service Manifest. He has also amassed a £11.5m pension pot over his long career, and will continue to be paid his £1.1m salary for a year.

Such is modern capitalism.  The boss class win, whether or not they succeed ...

Music of the week

Nostalgia ain't what it used to be.

Noodles

How many sponsors do they need?  The Mirror reports:

Manchester United have announced yet another commercial partner as Nissin join as a global sponsor.

The deposed champions may have finished outside of Champions League places for the first time in their history but it doesn't appear to have dampened their appeal.

Just days after confirming the world record £750m endorsement deal with adidas United have added another sponsorship string to their bow.

International food brand Nissin become the club's 29th official sponsor.

Nissin makes noodles.


    

Not playing the game

More on Lord Hill, the UK's new EU Commissioner.  The Guardian reports:

British officials say his primary function in Brussels will be to build alliances, strike deals and reach consensus with his EU peers with a view to assembling support for some of the reforms Cameron hopes to achieve if he is to fight and win a referendum in 2017 keeping Britain in the EU on new terms.

No, it won't.  EU Commissioners are not appointed to represent the views of their respective Member States.  Instead, they are expected to renounce national allegiances and adopt a communautaire status where the interests of the Commission and of Europe are foremost.  Of course, that need not prevent a little national politicking on the side but that needs to be done discreetly.

Furthermore, the idea of British officials that Lord Hill's role will be to support the UK Government's aims for the referendum will simply irritate the other EU Commissioners and the European Parliament, making it even less likely for him to achieve a desirable portfolio (or even to secure his status as a Commissioner).

About time British officials learned how the European game is played.

Jobs for the boys (and girls)

Ah yes, Lord Hill, the UK's new EU Commissioner.  The New Statesman sets out the problem:

The Prime Minister is off to Brussels today in an attempt to secure a juicy job for his new man in Europe, Jonathan Hill, who was appointed European Commissioner yesterday during a big government reshuffle.

Apparently the best roles for Britain’s European Commissioner would be trade, competition, or internal market – as our brand new Defence Secretary Michael Fallon told the Today programme this morning, “it would certainly help us” if Hill were to be handed one of these three briefs. “These are portfolios of interest to us, but not just for the UK… we want to see the EU get back on the right track,” Fallon continued.

There’s just one problem for Cameron. It's the European Commission President Jean-Claude Juncker who is the person who gives roles to European Commissioners, and it was Juncker about whom the PM kicked up such a fuss before he was about to take the presidency.

Including President Juncker, there will be some 28 Commissioners, one from each of the member states.  The difficulty lies in the fact that, given the Commssion's relatively restricted range of responsibilities, there are only between ten and fifteen worthwhile portfolios for allocation.  In an ideal world, therefore, there would only be ten to fifteen Commissioners.  But we have 28 and, as all the Commissioners are regarded as equal, each must have his own bailiwick; there can be no question of having a senior and a junior Commissioner working together on the same portfolio.

The current responsibilities of Commissioners are set out here.  Some of these posts are clearly sinecures, such as Digital Agenda, Research, Health, and Consumer Policy, where the Commission simply has very few functions to fulfil.  But, as each Commissioner must have his or her own Directorate-General, the number of directorates-general expands to match the number of Commissioners.

Crazy, yes, but that's the way it is. And of course each of the member states looks to gain a plum job for its own Commissioner.   In these circumstances, never mind Cameron's three favoured portfolios - Lord Hill will be doing well just to get one of the portfolios with real content.

 
 

Headline of the day

What is it about sausages that brings out the wurst in headline writers?

German sausage cartel caught bangers to rights

Wurst-case scenario for sausage makers after anti-cartel watchdog slaps down record €338m fine for price-fixing

There are worse places than Spain for a holiday

"The First Blast of the Trumpet Against the Monstruous Regiment of Women"

Does Cameron really suppose that, just because Nicky, Liz, Tina and Esther have got their knees under the cabinet table, that all will be for the best in this best of all possible worlds?

Predecessors such as Maria and Sayeeda were far from being a howling success ,,,

 

Seven - one

Likely to be the new foreign secretary?  The Guardian reports:

Philip Hammond is regarded by the top of the Conservative party as an impressive operator, who has presided over steep budget cuts, preparations for an exit from Afghanistan and a large redundancy programme at the Ministry of Defence without attracting too many negative tabloid headlines.

His grasp of detail, some might say bordering on control freakery, may have appealed to David Cameron searching for someone with the stamina to repatriate powers from Brussels and renegotiate relations with the EU. What would attract many others in the Tory party is that he is considered a staunch Eurosceptic.

...

Not the most charismatic of senior Tories, the former businessman is nevertheless known as "Big Phil" at Conservative HQ.

Aye, and look what happened when the other Big Phil came up against the Germans ...    

 

It's not going to happen

Probably impractical, but even if it were possible to re-establish a Scottish Stock Exchange, it would probably be immediately acquired by London, American or European interests.  The Guardian reports:

As the vote on independence approaches, a report shows that a notional index of 100 Scottish companies currently listed on the London Stock Exchange would have grown by 5.7% in real terms (with dividends reinvested) since 1955.

But it would have been outperformed by stocks from the rest of the UK, which rose 6.8% over the same period. The difference is due to the predominance of financial companies in the "Scotsie 100", and in particular the near collapse of Royal Bank of Scotland and HBOS in the banking crisis. Without this, it would have outperformed the UK index by a small margin.

The report, by the London Business School and consultancy Walbrook Economics, uses the location of a company's headquarters to judge whether it is Scottish or not. Apart from financial companies such as banks and investment trusts, the Scotsie index is dominated by utilities, and oil and gas companies. The largest are energy business SSE, insurer Standard Life, Royal Bank of Scotland, FTSE100 engineer Weir Group and Aggreko, the generator manufacturer.

Wot, no mention of A G Barr plc (maker of our other national drink)?  The bigger whisky companies belong to multi-nationals of course, as do most of the bigger breweries - for example Tennents is owned by the Magners company - though the Caledonian Brewery (Deuchars and Caley 80/-) remains independent.

 

Quote of the day

Trust.  Aye. well maybe.  The Observer contemplates:

Trust me, I'm a banker. Don't think so. Trust me, I'm a doctor. Did you ever work at Mid-Staffs? Trust me, I'm from the intelligence services. And what did you have to do with rendition and torture? Trust me, I'm a police officer. How many innocent people did you shoot or stitch up to today? Trust me, I'm a bishop. Catholic or Anglican? Child abuser or investor in Wonga? Trust me, I'm a supermarket. How much horse is there in your burgers? Trust me, I'm from the newspapers. When does your trial begin? Trust me, I'm from the BBC. And what did you know about Jimmy Savile? Trust me, I'm a celebrity. How much tax are you avoiding? And were you mates with Rolf Harris?

Trust me, I'm a politician. Now, you're really having a laugh.

Sad, really.

   

Quote of the day

The otherwise estimable Lucy has a balanced view of the considerations underlying the imminent referendum:

There are those who argue against it, of course. Scotland should stay just as it is! Independence, nivver darken our doors! Caledonian nationalism, like all nationalism, is a terrible idea spouted by the worst, most morally and psychologically incompetent people ever to have battered a Mars bar. Think of the ethno-chauvinism it will unleash: the small-mindedness, the petty sense of superiority, the alienation, bile and gracelessness that will wash over the land, poisoning e'en unto the last crystalline Highland spring, you sunless goons!

But I say, "Tish tosh!" to such dour preoccupations. I think the "ayes" have it right, and not just because it's short for "aye, have ye no' seen wha's in charge of England the noo? Jes' a wain, wi' a face lik' a bloated haggis an' a mind mair sleekit, cow'rin an tim'rous than any wee mousie ye ivver saw! They'll aw be greetin' afore he's done". This line is carved into every shovel currently being smuggled down to Hadrian's Wall, so that the digging can start on polling night, and the country rowed 4ft north by sun up on 19 September.

 

Look after the pennies ...

Look, I suppose they need the money.  The Telegraph reports:

One Cabinet minister has claimed the cost of paying for an 11p ruler on his expenses.

Kenneth Clarke, the Cabinet Office minister, charged the taxpayer for an 11p ruler, according to the latest release of MPs’ expenses claims.

Vince Cable, the Business Secretary, was found to have claimed 43p for scissors.

David Cameron, the Prime Minister, claimed the cost of a £4.68 glue stick and 8p for a box of clips.

Latest figures for MPs expenses revealed some of Britain’s most senior politicians, are repeatedly submitting claims for trivial items.

Triumph and disaster

Vamos muchachos!

They're getting excited:

Earth has not anything to show more fair

It's the end of an era.  I don't suppose that I would ever again have travelled on a London bus but I certainly will not now.  City AM  reports:

London buses will no longer accept fares paid in cash in a move that Transport for London (TfL) says will save the capital £24m a year.

From today, passengers will only be able to pay for bus fares using an Oyster card, contactless credit or debit card or travelcard ticket.

It also means that most of the jokes in this fine rendition will be meaningless to those of tender years:

Quote of the day

From Rawnsley in The Observer (here):

David Cameron once grasped that its reputation as a party of the rich was a serious impediment to the Tories. In opposition, when he was trying to give his party a detox and present himself as a different kind of Tory leader, he made several speeches challenging big business, attacking high finance and swearing that he would never be the mouthpiece for either of them.

In the wake of the financial crisis, he went so far as to deplore "markets without morality", rhetoric that could fit snugly into any of Mr Miliband's speeches arguing for a new form of more responsible capitalism.

Now Mr Cameron hosts fundraisers heaving with financial speculators. Perhaps he never really believed a word of it when he used to denounce them. Perhaps he has concluded that the public belief that the Tories are "the party of the rich" is just too indelible for him to shift. So he might as well make his cynical, if demeaning, best of it by stuffing his party's campaign war chest with cheques from Russian bankers who think a game of tennis with him is worth 160 grand.

   

Music of the week

A reminder to men everywhere not to take their spouses lightly.

How the City gets it wrong

CityAM reports:

PUB AND brewing giant Greene King yesterday reported record annual sales and profit.

The company said its revenues were up 6.9 per cent to £1.3bn and its pre-tax profit was up 7.4 per cent to £158.2m.

The group added 48 new sites during the year as part of a five-year plan to increase its estate to 1,100.

Following the acquisitions, profit for the retail business grew 12 per cent compared to the prior year.

But the City thought it should have done better.  As a result:

Shares in FTSE 250-quoted Greene King fell 3.6 per cent yesterday to close at 816.5p.

A not atypical over-reaction.  They don't recognise a good thing when it stares them in the face.  But, as I used to enjoy a pint of Belhaven (now owned by Greene King), I have put my money where my mouth is and bought some shares,  We will see - over the next few days and weeks - if my bet is justified.

 
Update:  After the market has been open for 40 minutes, the shares are now priced at 830 pence, an increase of 1.65%, which is enough to give me a modest capital gain (even after allowing for stamp duty and admin fees).  Now do I take my modest profit?  Or hang on for better things?  The latter, I think, comfortable in the knowledge that the shares will in any case deliver annual dividends of over 3%.

Further update:  Share price now (9.22 am) over 840p.

This is becoming boring:

   

Cartoon of the day

http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/cartoon/2014/jul/03/george-osborne-avoiding-maths-question-steve-bell

Whoring?

Is there anything these guys will not do for money?  The Guardian reports:

A game of tennis with David Cameron and Boris Johnson has been sold off by the Conservative party for £160,000 to the banker wife of a former minister in Vladimir Putin's government.

The extraordinary prize was the star lot at the Conservative party's summer fundraising ball on Wednesday at the Hurlingham Club, Fulham, west London, and was billed as giving the successful bidder the chance to play "the ultimate tennis match". The auction winner was Lubov Chernukhin, the wife of Vladimir Chernukhin, who was Russia's deputy finance minister during Putin's first term in office.

She is a banker, and according to Electoral Commission records had once been declared an "impermissible donor" in April 2012 when she attempted to give £10,000 to the party. However, since then Lubov Chernukhin – who is British – has made a further three donations worth a total of £5,500, which have all been accepted.

 

Aeroplanes

"For what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his soul"

Though TB's soul was probably lost a long time ago.  But he'd better have a long spoon handy.  The Guardian reports:

Tony Blair has agreed to advise the Egyptian president, Abdel Fattah el-Sisi, who came to power in a military coup last year, as part of a programme funded by the United Arab Emirates that has promised to deliver huge "business opportunities" to those involved, the Guardian has learned.

The former prime minister, now Middle East peace envoy, who supported the coup against Egypt's elected president Mohamed Morsi, is to give Sisi advice on "economic reform" in collaboration with a UAE-financed taskforce in Cairo – a decision criticised by one former ally.

The UAE taskforce is being run by the management consultancy Strategy&, formerly Booz and Co, now part of PricewaterhouseCoopers, to attract investment into Egypt's crisis-ridden economy at a forthcoming Egypt donors' conference sponsored by the oil-rich UAE, Kuwait and Saudi Arabia.

Blair's decision to become involved in Gulf-financed support of the Sisi regime, which is estimated to have killed more than 2,500 protesters and jailed more than 20,000 over the past year, has been attacked.

Quote of the day

From The Guardian (here):

In a gesture as eloquent as it was symbolic (or as empty as it was crass), Ukip's 24 MEPs turned their backs on the EU's flag and unofficial anthem during the opening session of the European parliament in Strasbourg on Tuesday. As a chamber orchestra played Beethoven's Ode to Joy, Britain's largest single contingent of Euro-parliamentarians stood solemnly facing the other way, looking defiant and ever so slightly silly.

Bunch of fruitcakes.