If you believe a vocal lobby of doomsayers, at the flick of a switch on the Large Hadron Collider (LHC) next week the world will be consumed from the inside out and turned to a pile of grey goo. Yesterday their apocalyptic warnings were challenged by a report from the scientists behind the project outlining just how safe it is to recreate the Big Bang under the France-Switzerland border.
The Large Hadron Collider - the atom-smashing machine built underneath the Alps - has sent more internet-based harbingers of doom into a spin than it will have atomic particles whizzing around its 17-mile circumference when it is put into action next week. They fear that the energies released will be so powerful that a runaway black hole will be created that will engulf the planet or produce “quantum strangelets” transforming the Earth into a dead lump of “strange matter”.
So there you are. Forget the Labour leadership struggle. Put away your doubts about local income tax. Stop worrying about sterling's decline. Cease complaining about the Hibees' abysmal start to the season. It all ends next Wednesday.
I blame the French.
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