"Look, er, y'know, just cos I never mentioned any Italian players, y'know, doesn't mean I'm biased or anything; it's just that, like, I don't know their names. And, OK, er, I never really understood the laws, y'know, which makes it difficult to say why, er, a penalty has been awarded.
But look, er, the BBC didn't hire me as a summariser cos of my, er, understanding of rugby tactics or my, er, understanding of the laws. And I admit, y'know, that I'm not very good with, er, words n'that.
No, it is enough, y'know, that I'm a former England captain. What other, er, qualifications do you need?"