05 May 2006

Away wi' the fairies,again

The nanny state moves on. The Herald reports on the latest attempts to bring civilisation to the Scottish peasants:
"Licensing trade leaders have raised concerns over plans to make bars promote healthy eating among their customers. Under new regulations being considered by the Scottish Executive, landlords may have to provide "sensible eating" advice to their customers in order to obtain a licence.
The requirement is contained in a discussion document setting out a series of new conditions for prospective publicans. Although fears have been raised that the move is aimed at banning meals such as pie beans and chips from being served, industry figures have said there are no plans to restrict the type of food pubs can sell."

Picture the scene:
Customer: "A pint of heavy, please, and a pie"
Barman: "I am obliged by the Scottish Executive regulations to warn you that the pie contains more than 400 calories or approximately one-fifth of the recommended daily calorie intake for an adult male."
Customer: "Gie's a break, pal. I'm hungry."
Barman: "Furthermore, the filling in the pie includes 20 per cent grease, 20 per cent rusk (also known as sawdust) and 40 per cent reconstituted meat of doubtful provenance but which may once have been within spitting distance of a dead sheep."
Customer: "You looking for trouble?"
Barman: "While the pie is rich in carbohydrates, it is notably deficient in vitamins and in omega 3 fatty acids and will make only a marginal contribution to a balanced diet."
Customer: "Aw, you should have said that first. Forget the pie - I'll have the tuna quiche with rocket salad."

Not very likely, is it?

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