Cricket - England are making a cuddy of it

The Guardian's over-by-over commentary is getting rather upset:

Can England actually win this? This short answer is 'no'; the longer answer is 'noo'. But if they take a couple of early wickets, you never, ever know. That's a lie: you do know.

1st over: South Africa 3-0 (chasing about 12) de Villiers chops the first ball, from Anderson, straight into the hands of gully. EXCEPT GULLY'S AN EFFING INVISIBLE MAN! HE ISN'T BLOODY THERE! WHAT HAPPENED TO BLOODY ATTACKING WHEN YOU'RE DEFENDING A TOTAL OF AROUND 12?! AND THIS ISN'T ME BEING WISE AFTER THE EVENT BECAUSE I THOUGHT 'THEY SHOULD HAVE A GULLY' LITERALLY SECONDS AFTER BARRY RICHARDS SAID ON SKY SPORTS. Later in the over, Smith is beaten by one from Anderson that keeps low and then gets off the mark with a work for two. "Permission for lower lip to wobble please Mr Smyth," says Andy Bradshaw. Permission denied, you miserable, cowardly little Eng- gah, go on then. Mine just has.

No need for shouting. It's only a game, you know...