Made from mentally stimulated girders

I suppose that we should be grateful that this is not going to be marketed as an aid to sports performance. From The Herald (here):

"The unveiling of a new product from AG Barr, the Scottish soft drinks manufacturer, is always a fanfare event – and yesterday's launch of Irn-Bru 32 high-energy drink was no exception. Billing the drink characteristically in mock-Scots lingo as "pure mental stimulation", Roger White, Barr's chief executive, said the Glasgow-based company would be spending £3m on marketing and publicity this year to take on other high-energy products, such as market leader Red Bull.
Irn-Bru 32 is the first new Irn-Bru drink from the company since it launched the diet version of the iconic soft drink 26 years ago. The energy drink will be made in AG Barr's factory in Cumbernauld, which is undergoing a £17m extension."